So the first time I ever tried meditation, I can't truly remember. If you’re anything like me you probably dipped your toe in, and thought "what am I even doing right now".
There I was sat thinking is this it? And like most, I gave up. What is the point of sitting there when I have so much to do, and so much to enjoy, or so much to worry about it!
My brother took a deeper adventure into meditation and he ended up attending his first, second and third vipassana by the time I decided to venture into it. I really didn’t garner much of an idea of it from him. He had his weariness about the practice, do’s and don’s, but from what I know now, experience truly is everything. In many ways I knew that to be true anyway. Much like when someone has an opinion over a location or a person; the experience can be totally different for YOU, and its best to go and truly feel your way through an experience to understand it fully.
In 2019 I booked my first 10 day retreat. Through fear of sitting with myself, facing myself? I ended up cancelling it. I couldn’t comprehend the idea of just sitting with myself and letting my thoughts swirl. Covid happened, and life went on. I don’t think I even thought of it again.
2023 came around. Randomly one day in the salon talking to one of my clients, on the subject of meditation, it was like I was jolted back to the idea that I once wanted to attend Vipassana. Something like “Oh yeah vipassana, you know what I’ll go book it now”; and that was it (So casual!). Months later coming into December 2023 I was headed off to Dhamma Sukhakari Vipassana centre for my first 10 day silent retreat.
Life would never be the same again.